Psychic Wanted, needing some answers.

Oh my, where do I begin. Well, I want to keep this short. I had an incident happen and it has just about crippled me with anger. My thoughts can not leave it alone. I am having a very hard time letting this one go, and am trying to handle it in a dignified manner, in a way that I can be proud of myself for. I think the reason why my thoughts just won't let it be is because I know that what is done is done, and I just have to smile and deal with it, and this isn't the first time I've been made to feel like the cool crowd is getting away with their cruelty again.

If there is someone who has the ability to be able to see deeper into my situation than I am able to, I would be very willing to talk with you by phone.

Lovechild, have you tried sleeping with ameythst under your pillow? If you do not have a ameythst crystal, see if you have a ring or bracklet with an ameythst stone in it. I know you will it find it has a calming effect, as to your problem I can't offer you anything but maybe after you get more in a positive frame of mind you can effectively deal with it. I have the feeling you are feeling extreme dislike or hate for someone, perhaps bitterness would be a better word.
SC

Hi SC, I appreciate the advice.

It has been three days since the incident, and every morning I wake up it is the first thing on my mind, and the only thing on my mind the rest of the day. There is a person involved, but I can't say I am bitter towards them, very, very aggravated with them would be a better word for it. I have tried to meditate and relax my mind over this, but I can't focus on my meditation because this situation has complete control over my thoughts. I'm feeling very hurt, stepped on, and been made to feel like a big joke, and it doesn't feel good at all. I'm having a hard time with this.

lUVCHILD, I will keep you in my thoughts. I know in time things will work out for you, just do your best to stay positive.
SC

LuvChild you need to try to not dwell on this. Iknow easier said than done. But you will only make it worse if you put alot of thought and emotion into this. Read my thread on construct elementals under abilities. You will start to draw negative things to you and this person is going to continue to hurt you by making you feed this negativity they started. Cleanse yourself after thinking about or dealing with the issue, positive drives away negative. come and talk anytime.

Oh luvchild, I know it's hard to not think about hurtful things. I had an incident with my sister over helping to take care of my mom that escalated into her bashing my bipolar son. It took me several days to finally stop dwelling on her hurtful words. I tried to stay busy and I finally had to banish her from my life. I told her she could talk to me about Mom, but she was not to call me for anything else. I told her I did not need her drama and anger infecting my life. I visualized closing a door on her as I spoke to her. I kept my cool - I never showed her my anger towards her.

After that, my mind cleared and I was able to forget - I was not thinking about it constantly. It was the act of pushing the bad feelings out and replacing them with happiness - thinking about and doing for my family that worked. Even if you don't actually speak to the person, just voicing your feelings and stating that they will not hurt you anymore could help you. Easier said than done, I know. It'll get better as the days go on.

southerncharm wrote:

lUVCHILD, I will keep you in my thoughts. I know in time things will work out for you, just do your best to stay positive.
SC

Thank you SC, I really appreciate the prayers, and knowing that someone is praying for me over this gives me a lot of comfort. When you feel out numbered the support of just one person can really help.

Sharra1515 wrote:

LuvChild you need to try to not dwell on this. Iknow easier said than done. But you will only make it worse if you put alot of thought and emotion into this. Read my thread on construct elementals under abilities. You will start to draw negative things to you and this person is going to continue to hurt you by making you feed this negativity they started. Cleanse yourself after thinking about or dealing with the issue, positive drives away negative. come and talk anytime.

Dwelling has ALWAYS been tough for me not to do. You're right, I know I need to let it go, and I really, really wish I could, but I have never been able to do that easily. My husband can do that, he is able to turn it off and focus on the present when he needs to, that lucky man. "You can't worry about what you can't control" is what he likes to say about that. Festering on it is only going to hurt me, but this certain situation is a really tough one this time. Depending upon the situation, it can take days for me to finally get over it and not be affected by it anymore. "Time heals all wounds" can best describe how I deal with things. The further in the past it gets, the less important it becomes and the anger falls away. But this situation is a very challenging one and my emotions feel like they have gone through a brutal battle.

onetruebeliever wrote:

Oh luvchild, I know it's hard to not think about hurtful things. I had an incident with my sister over helping to take care of my mom that escalated into her bashing my bipolar son. It took me several days to finally stop dwelling on her hurtful words. I tried to stay busy and I finally had to banish her from my life. I told her she could talk to me about Mom, but she was not to call me for anything else. I told her I did not need her drama and anger infecting my life. I visualized closing a door on her as I spoke to her. I kept my cool - I never showed her my anger towards her.

After that, my mind cleared and I was able to forget - I was not thinking about it constantly. It was the act of pushing the bad feelings out and replacing them with happiness - thinking about and doing for my family that worked. Even if you don't actually speak to the person, just voicing your feelings and stating that they will not hurt you anymore could help you. Easier said than done, I know. It'll get better as the days go on.

Good for you for standing up to your sister, and I would definitely do the same thing, especially if I had a son that someone started to bash. That's unacceptable. I don't have any children right now, but I know that I would never allow anyone to mistreat them.

This particular person, actually persons, that has caused me to ride this emotional roller coaster for so long, I can not banish, I work with them. I have to be professional and civilized to them everyday, regardless of how they have made me feel. Today there was a little bit of resolution, but the stigma of the situation is still very much there, and has caused a lot of tension among us. I'm proud of myself for handling it professionally, and I didn't go down without fighting, but now it has created a very negative working environment, and I'm left to somehow pick myself up from this, learn from it, and begin to heal from it, while continuing to work with these ladies that made me feel stepped on.

I know I may be making it seem like it was just some office caddishness, or a little dispute among co-workers, but this one wasn't. I really wish I could go into detail, but I wouldn't know how to explain it without giving you the entire background on what kind of work that I do, and details about our procedures.. etc.

I just feel very beaten up right now by my emotions.

I'm sorry. I hope you feel better about the situation soon. Just know that I am thinking and sending good thoughts for you.

onetruebeliever wrote:

I'm sorry. I hope you feel better about the situation soon. Just know that I am thinking and sending good thoughts for you.

I appreciate the good thoughts, and the encouraging words. What a blessing to have a place to come to where you know you are talking to good people.

Luvchild wrote:

Oh my, where do I begin. Well, I want to keep this short. I had an incident happen and it has just about crippled me with anger. My thoughts can not leave it alone. I am having a very hard time letting this one go, and am trying to handle it in a dignified manner, in a way that I can be proud of myself for. I think the reason why my thoughts just won't let it be is because I know that what is done is done, and I just have to smile and deal with it, and this isn't the first time I've been made to feel like the cool crowd is getting away with their cruelty again.

If there is someone who has the ability to be able to see deeper into my situation than I am able to, I would be very willing to talk with you by phone.

Hello Luvchild,

Sorry to hear of your unfortunate incident.

Sadly it appears as if you are forced to fuction in this enviroment out of need rather then by choice.

With that said here is what little advice I can offer. It may seem of little help at present but perhaps in time it might prove to be of value:

1) you can not control the actions of others, only the actions of yourself.

2) Don't let ones of little true value to you live "rent free" in your head. When you do this, (regardless of situation) you impower others to rule your thoughts and in time your very actions..

Overly responsible people, (like yourself), in some enviroments tend to disregard or devalue positive actions or words from others yet choose to focus or dwell on the negative ones. Why this is so I'm not sure. I feel that just recently positive things have been brought to your attention yet you choose to dismiss them.

In this case I suspect your real anger stems from the possible results that could occur due to the actions of others. To simplify my explaination I'll refer to it as the "blame game".

Course of action: Handle the situation in a professional fashion. Sounds to me as if you have already done this. Just the same it does not remove the anger and feelings of being betrayed that often accompany the action. Accept these feelings for what they are then release them.

These coworkers are NOT your friends nor will they ever be, (you already know this). Be sure to document all your work for your own protection. In time all things of importance will be revealed. Please try to remenber that often these actions are not personal, they simply stems from fear of one's own short comings.

And if they are personal then they are actions of a jealous nature and nothing more.

Most importantly remenber that actions such as these often come from others feeling their own short comings. Sadly it's humane nature to point at others to distract from the real problems at hand. Don't claim ownership of these issues.

I may be off track and my words of little assistance but I hope they help just the same.

And please do not take my words as those of one being "preachy" but rather one voicing thoughts you already know to be true.

Topper

Luvchild wrote:

Oh my, where do I begin. Well, I want to keep this short. I had an incident happen and it has just about crippled me with anger. My thoughts can not leave it alone. I am having a very hard time letting this one go, and am trying to handle it in a dignified manner, in a way that I can be proud of myself for. I think the reason why my thoughts just won't let it be is because I know that what is done is done, and I just have to smile and deal with it, and this isn't the first time I've been made to feel like the cool crowd is getting away with their cruelty again.

If there is someone who has the ability to be able to see deeper into my situation than I am able to, I would be very willing to talk with you by phone.

Hi Luvchild,

I am the very same way, and tend to dwell on things. I agree with Topper.
If you allow people to cause you stress, it will only hurt you more. I have a self defeating attitude, too. The only way I can deal with it is to send positive thoughts or prayers to the people involved. Trust me, it really helps. I also wear something black to deflect negative energy. Even a black stone, like onxy
can help.But the prayers and thoughts are the key. It takes the ball out of your court and puts it into theirs, psychologically. I hope things are better now.

((((HUGS))))

Wendy